Friday, August 26, 2016

Reenactment vs. Recreation - politics and art in the SCA

A huge word storm erupted among some of my SCA friends this last week.  That is only one way some of this has been cycling through my awareness lately, just look at my last post.

And a new friend from a very different direction who does Roman re enactment made a small comment, no offence intended, that the SCA doesn't care about accuracy.  My reply is that some people do.

The official literature of the SCA will say that what we do is re-creation.  We do pre 1600 European centric history, without all the unpleasant things like plague and inquisitions.  But the C does stand for Creative.

And this is where the word storms blow up.  There are many talented artisans seeking higher level awards (or sometimes surprised by higher level awards) who pursue very serious scholarship in the name of doing their chosen art in the most historical way that is modernly possible.  And as we are an educational non-profit, this is to be greatly appreciated and encouraged.

On the other hand, there are members who as passionately pursue participation for the fun of it.  There are a number of geeks and gamers, equally interested in history and fantasy, who just want to have fun.

Sometimes these two groups rub each other the wrong way.  It should also be noted that there are people how totter the fence on this one.

Where it gets ugly is when they start calling each other names; things like boring, war bunnies, anal, party animals....

And I feel really torn each time this argument breaks out again.  I really greatly admire the level of scholarship with which some people apply themselves.  Sometimes I get really interested and dig pretty deep, but I just don't have the time and resources to go be as disciplined and complete as some our wonderful scholars are.  Also, I live this stressful life; I need fun.  Sometimes I can hear a well researched and perfectly period performance and be .... bored to tears even while appreciating it.

I am a creative person, it is in the very nature of my brain to color outside the lines.  With the wrong color.  And so I am one of those that uncomfortably straddles the fence.

But here is the thing, we need feet on the ground.  We need memberships and site fees.  We need volunteers to do any of the things we love, even if we don't always love the something.

We are Anachronism, something out of it's proper time.  We are Creative, we have to be to pull of the Anachronism.  But before that, we are a Society.  We are a community, a tribe, a corporation.  We are geopolitical groups and households. We are families by birth and chosen families.  We are smart and silly and stubborn and irritating and socially awkward and nobel beyond belief.  We need each other to make this work.  We need to serve the dream, our dream, in a way that doesn't turn it into somebody else's nightmare.

These are my own views, don't blame the management.  But I love you guys, I really do.  The day that you stop challenging me to dig deeper and think harder and try something new, I will be out of here.  The day that it is more work than fun, I am out of here.  Life's too short, and getting shorter all the time from my point of view.  But hey, lets see if we can figure out gentle ways to communicate, especially online, so we can last another 50 years.

Friday, August 19, 2016

Resolving conflict caused by competition for recognition in social group dynamics, or STFU

There was some drama this week among my medieval hobby friends.  I didn't see it, I don't need to see it.

A few weeks ago another friend from this same group told me about something.  I only had it from one point of view and didn't know who had talked to her, but I wanted to rise up, do something to right the wrong.

Every.  Single.  Social.  Group.  Every one, from the churches I have been involved in through office politics.  People say mean thing to each other, compete for recognition, get hurt and turn into martyrs.

And often I feel like I want to come to the defense, be the champion, somehow turn the tide and make the world a better place.  I am not one for quick comebacks, though.  I'm also and introvert.  By the time I figure out what I want to say, the moment is long gone or I think better of it.

But I do ponder and write about stuff.

And I do get angry and hurt sometimes myself.  This is what I have observed.  Some people are just really good at pushy self-promotion and kissing up to the right people.  And they are really good at not saying the nasty little mean things in front of the people who they are trying to impress.  It's us powerless shlubs that get the mean remarks.  And they are really good at not saying it in front of anyone else.  And so my friend feels helpless, and I feel helpless.

And we give up.

We give up doing something we enjoy because it is not worth the fight.  It is unfair, but these people always win.

Now, this just sounds like a whiny rant, but I have another point.

Most of these people who are so hurtful, I don't think they really hear themselves, I don't think they know how hurtful they are, I don't think they know any other way to play the social game.

I didn't know another way to handle the conflict and the hurt feelings.  But I saw another way last weekend.

I was in a business meeting of a Quaker group that I have been attending, a group that practices silence.  An issue was brought up. and someone expressed displeasure at something, and people started getting defensive, and it could easily ended in several people walking away carrying a lot of self-righteous hurt and anger, over a really small thing.

Then the person appointed by the group to keep things on track abruptly said "Let's go into silence."  And we sat in silence, and...  Thought?  Listened for God?  Reflected on the words that were said?  And after a bit, one person spoke, then another.  They reflected care for the person who brought up the problem.  They reflected a willingness to find a resolution.  They reflected that the person who used to handle this issue was no longer with them, and was missed, and the sadness over that.

Instead of blaming and competing and criticizing, people listened to each other, showed caring and respect for each other.

I don't know what the long term results will be, but I think there is something very powerful in not being so quick to have all the snappy answers and comebacks.  I think the honorable behavior that my medieval group, the professionalism in my workplace, the love of God my former churches desired; I think they could all benefit from sometimes just listening and reflecting before speaking.

I know that harsh words and escalating anger are not taking us any place good. I hope we can try to learn a different way.